Mississippi Valley Mayhem puts a modern spin on the old-school game of women's roller derby that so many people are familiar with.

This energetic game is played under the rules of the Women's Flat Track Derby Association and can be played on any flat surface large enough to fit the rink.  The game, or bout, which it is more formally called, is essentially a race between two teams.  Each team puts in five players at a time, four of which are blockers while one is the jammer, whose sole purpose is to score points by passing the other team's players.  The blocker's job is to help get her jammer through the pack while simultaneously holding back the opposing team's blocker.  Each team has its own unique strategies, making the game complex and multi-layered.

This hard-hitting game can get very physical, and although the WFTDA sets up rules—such as no elbows to the head and, possibly the most important, no fighting—it cannot prevent the inevitable bruises and other injuries.  Professor Susan Crutchfield, a member of Mississippi Valley Mayhem, said, "I count on being bruised after a bout (and sometimes after a practice), and I know that my bones can be broken and I can sustain a concussion if I and the other women on the rink are not mindful."  The injuries the players sustain are just a minor consequence to playing on such a lively and rugged team.  

The team consists of 20 teachers, mothers, office workers, graphic designers, beauticians and students who not only come ready to play an aggressive bout, but dress in retro costumes that add spunk to the game which both the fans and the team enjoy.

"Some of us still wear fishnets and miniskirts to play; some enjoy putting on intimidating makeup on game day … And we all choose derby names.  My name is Bride of Spankenstein, and the names of some of the other players on my team are Slameo, The Ambusher, Twitch, No Apologies, Kayla SMASH!, Kacie Chase-em, Maura Tyranny and Vicious Valerina," said Crutchfield.  The showmanship and intensity of the game along with the many themes applied to certain bouts such as "The Fight before Christmas" and "Ghouls out for Summer" provide for an exciting atmosphere for the fans and members of Mississippi Valley Mayhem.

Mississippi Valley Mayhem exists to promote the sport of women's flat track roller derby in the Midwest, to help local charities and organizations and to create positive female role models in our community. The league is open to all qualified participants who meet membership requirements.

All activities, policies and rules are designed with the following in mind: the safety of all participants; the best interests of the league as a whole; and that all decisions are made "by the skaters, for the skaters."

For further information on Mississippi Valley Mayhem or the Women's Flat Track Roller Derby League, contact Professor Susan Crutchfield of UW-La Crosse.